A Hollywood Meeting

Monday, July 26th 2010

Okay guys, we're looking to cast the new project Bible: The Beginning.


Great, this is a great project.

I think Sam Raimi is going to direct.

Great. We need zombies.

And we had someone great for the role of Mary ....

... Cameron Diaz?

No, no ...

Ah! Jennifer Love Hewitt?

Yeah, Jen. She's a perfect fit.

A Russel Crowe as Jesus?

Yeah, except he's now a roman insider who blows the whistle on an enormous cover up?

What's that? Well ...

... we've had a few re-writes.

The latest one?

Erm ... the Roman State is hiding, from the senate, a conspiracy to perfect a race of dinosaur robots. It's a sort of sci-fi robot politico-thriller with a historical edge.

Ah. And this is historically accurate?

As far as we know. The dinobots are metaphorical. But it's all period.

Ah. And who's writing the script?

The Coen brothers.

Great. That's some indie cred there. Do you think we'll be able to get Johnny Depp to star as Senator Max Kidd?

Yeah, I think so. His people are close to signing up.

Great. Now. About the whole "Virgin Mary" thing .. to me it's too "Something about Mary." Can we re-imagine that?

What if we move the whole thing into the jane Austen era?

Yeah. That will get the women in. Can we throw in some vampires?

(sighs) That's done. I think the next thing will be misunderstood adolescent trolls.

Great! They'll be CGI?


And I like the design for the Giant Egg of Enlightenment they all fight over. The only thing I'm wondering ...

Ah. I know what you're talkin about. The three wise men. We're thinking Scarlett Johansson, Angelina Jolie and Jessica Alba. We've done research that says the Three Wise Men are better as women. It plays well with the 30-45 demographic.